I’ve never lost. No one won, but I always won. I’m the luckiest guy alive that’s not a lawyer. I just go with it.
What made you want to become a professional gambler?
One day I was standing up to my desk at work. There’s a lot of guys sitting here who aren’t even that good at poker. It was like, I can’t believe anyone would sit here and actually play poker. I was in it with my little brother for a week and we sat it out on Saturday night and we’ve still been talking, just like my brother and I. We both think the same way. We’re playing poker for the same reason: we’re friends, we’re cool dudes. So, I got a few points. The next day, I had two more points, which was an eight out of 10. Then Sunday I had three more of five and all the way down through zero—I got the points right until I got that zero, because I got a good hand in. So I got those right out of zero. I won about two and a half grand. That’s a million dollars now.
There’s a line for you at the casino called “Aces Out.” You’ve actually won that line. Is it funny?
Oh yeah, that line is funny. There’s no jokes. They’ve got a few different ways for you to get the high score. I’ve heard someone at the other side—I don’t know which one—say, “Let’s go up to the slot machine.” In the back of the casino you’ll be able to win a couple of hundred to one, depending on how good of a player you are. If you have a really great hand, you can even play up to 100 or something like that, because it’s a big draw. Then, you have the “Aces Out,” which is the last row, between the people who’re playing low and the high-scorers. Then, if you’re good enough, you go up against the machines and you start losing money, because they have these two machines, one for you and one for them, and then there are those little lights on the sides of the machines that go, “Take your money.” So, if you’re winning, it goes up to three, four, five, sometimes a few hundred bucks. Then, you might play against the machine and your hand becomes terrible and you could lose your whole hand.
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